If You Dance to the Music, You Got To Pay the Piper

In fairness, I was never in attendance at one of former First Lady Hillary Clinton’s various and sundry paid appearances—the ones necessitated by her and the Prez being “flat broke” in 2000.

That deadbeat.

So, she gathered herself together and schlepped around the country, making herself available to union congresses, corporate retreats and orthodontic conventions. You know, with that relatable laugh and rich, warm, fireside delivery she has—$225K a pop was a steal. No, really, it was stealing.

See, here’s what I’m thinking: the ONLY reason you would pay this kind of bread for HRC’s warmed-over bromides and self-serving anecdotes from her pro bono work with the great unwashed in Arkansas is that you’re not buying the speech, but the speaker. That all of these gigs were just a transfer of funds from people with bidness to conduct with a likely future President of the United States.

The fee, the plane, the imperial hotel accommodations, it was all a bet on a horse that just HAD to finish in the money one of these elections. I’m not trying to reform it, just to understand it.

I mean, you hear how she drones these days, when she’s competing for the highest office in the land and everything is at stake and she has almost as many jokewriters as Fallon. I’ve heard more modulation on a Samsung set to vibrate-mode.

So…imagine the excitement level she was putting out for her corporate audiences back in the rake-it-and-make-it days of the 2000s.

That…must’ve been brutal.

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