Face The Music and Dance, Dance, Dance

I’m not going to pretend I care about Bud Light or what happens to the brand going forward.

Bud Light tastes like what you would get if you rinsed water around in a nearly empty bottle of an actual beer, and then drank it.

If that makes me a “beer snob”, just call me Sudsy McSuddserson IV. And get me another Shiner.

Now, having said all that, Anheuser Busch can’t climb out of this thing as easily as they hope to.

In this week’s “earnings call”, execs are whining about how “it was just one can” (the Dylan Mulvaney-emblazoned one) and “it wasn’t for sale to the public” and, my personal favorite, “It wasn’t a formal campaign or advertisement”.

God, you guys must think we are morons.

You made THE CAN as part of your snazzy new “outreach” to combat how “fratty” your brand had become. Translation: you didn’t, and don’t, like your existing drinkers. You wanted some newer, cooler ones. Hope that works out, but I’ll believe the “Dylans” of this world are drinking canned light beer around the same time that I’ll picture John Kerry snarfing chicharrones from Buc-ee’s.

Social media is what you wanted. Social media is what you got. Dylan didn’t break into a warehouse, steal a can, and draw on it with a Sharpie.

A-B can fire people, and they have. A-B can whine, and baby, they are whining.

You, maybe, might try…admitting exactly what your stupid strategy was. How this was intended to work. Say sorry.

Of course, they probably won’t do that, because, if you think right-leaning beer drinkers are pissed, imagine the left woke mob sprinting to the defense of Dylan.

Ask Aunt Jemima or the lady from the butter box. If you can locate them

In fact, A-B is already getting heat from the HRC about how they need to show more support for Dylan and the trans community, seeing as though they are backing away from all that pretty quickly these days.

The proof that the beer bosses really, really don’t get what happened here is when they refer to public reaction as the result of “misinformation and confusion”.

I admit, I do see a lot of confused people here: out-of-touch executives, haughty marketing “pros” and a punk who thinks he’s Audrey Hepburn in “Breakfast at Tiffany’s”.

But they’re referring to us.

And we’re not confused about them at all.