The Boys start off the week with excellent news, because the United States recorded the lowest COVID cases in nearly a year. The former FDA commissioner believes it is time to open completely, and Chuck Todd has a pretty good back-and-forth with Dr. Anthony Fauci. Dr. Fauci hopes for a return to normal by next Mother’s Day, and a heroic cop carries a wounded child to safety, in the midst of the Times Square shooting. After winning the Kentucky Derby, Medina Spirit tests positive for betamethasone in a post-race drug test, and former President Trump calls the horse a “junky” on his blog. Michelle Obama is concerned for her daughters’ safety because of racism, and Blue Check is wishing Elon Musk would burn to death. Parents are running for the school board, after frustration over critical race theory and closures. Melinda Gates reportedly was worried about Bill’s connection to Jeffrey Epstein, and California’s population decreased for the first time ever. Speaker Nancy Pelosi blames her racist photo mix-up on a staffer, and a New York City teacher is caught sucking a man’s nipple during a Zoom class. The COVID Czar goes full McGurkin when asked why President Biden still wears a mask, and an “economic reporter” claims people aren’t looking for work, because they’re worried they’ll be assaulted for telling someone to put on a mask.