In yet another departure from the administration of Barack Obama, or “Barry” to his friends, (including, but not limited to, Harvey Weinstein, known to his friends as The Big Creepy Naked Guy) President Donald Trump released his official Christmas card yesterday, and it reads “Merry Christmas and Happy New Year” instead of his predecessor’s politically correct “Happy Holidays”.
I dig this. It’s making Christmas great again.
You see, I am one of those on’ry types who genuinely gets a little pissed whenever someone says “Happy Holidays” to me.
I get especially ticked-off when I hear it in a big, honking retail outlet that is making its annual budget on selling Christmas stuff, and has been since before freaking Halloween.
It’s as if in certain situations, so as not to offend the odd Muslim or Hindu or Vampire or Wiccan Tattoo Artist, we are supposed to pretend that all those Christmas Trees and Christmas decorations and Christmas Cards and Christmas lights are not earning kajillions of dollars for every box store in America, and all the hours of Christmas songs playing on every radio station in the country are really just “winter” music for some mysterious “holiday” that seems to roll around every twelve months.
In other words, it’s okay to sell a lot of crap and buy a lot of crap in celebration of the Li’l Baby Jesus, but it’s damned impolite sometimes to acknowledge that Christmas even exists.
And that’s a bunch of yuletide bullcrap, right there.
So, bah-freaking-humbug, beware saying “Happy Holidays” to me, ’cause I might just spit in your eye.
Or maybe I’ll just do what I normally do, which is wish you a very Merry Christmas, and then walk away.
Jesus Loves you and so do I,